Cry If I Want To
by moonswirl
Summary: Gleekathon, day 1204b: It's Brittany's first birthday since they lost Quinn, and Santana tries to make it special for her. - Trinity series


_Started my daily ficlets to make the hiatus pass, then decided to keep going with a 2nd cycle, and then a 3rd, 4th, etc through 57th cycle. Now cycle 58!_

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_**This is a shift day. **There are two updates today._

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**"Cry If I Want To"  
(Older) Brittany/Santana  
Trinity series  
_(all series now listed under the communities tab in my profile)_  
**

Brittany was awakened by the smell of food, and she smiled, knowing what it meant. Walking out of their bedroom, there was Santana in the kitchen, cutting fruit. By the looks of her, she must have started working as soon as she'd woken up.

"Morning," Brittany mumbled, still half asleep. Santana looked up, wiping her hands of the fruit before moving up to kiss her wife hello and…

"Happy birthday," she smiled, and Brittany sighed, holding on to her.

"Yes it is… as soon as I can keep my eyes open."

"I'll take care of that, just sit," Santana promised. "You can have both of our coffees," she told her, looking down at herself instead of stating the obvious 'since I can't have it.'

"Morning, too," Brittany smiled sleepily as she tapped at Santana's belly with her fingers. "What are we doing this morning?" she asked once she'd gotten her coffee and Santana finished preparing breakfast. They both had the day off from work, and Santana had told her she had the day planned for them.

"Well, we're going to eat first…" she placed the plates on the table and they got to eating.

"Like that plan," Brittany approved.

"After we're done, we get dressed…"

"Do we have to?" Brittany joked.

"And then we're going out to meet with Hattie and June. That's all I'm saying so far."

"Oh, come on…" Brittany played innocent.

"Not going to work on me, not today," Santana laughed, pushing the blonde hair out of Brittany's face. "But the sooner we're ready to go, the sooner you'll find out."

Once they had finished their breakfast, Santana had taken to clearing the table, sending Brittany to start getting ready. When it was her turn to go do the same, she'd gone back to their room, expecting to find Brittany almost ready. Instead she found her sat cross-legged on the bed, staring at a box before her. Santana felt a chill run up her spine. Brittany looked up and her eyes looked like she'd been fighting back tears for a couple minutes.

"Hey…" Santana took a step forward.

"I didn't know what to wear," Brittany's voice was flat. "I looked on your side of the closet, since you can't wear a lot of it right now… Then I saw this." Her fingers went to the writing on the side, Quinn's handwriting. It looked like it had once been used in the move from her old place into this apartment they shared. "Is this… Was it hers?"

"I found it when we started clearing out her room for the nursery," Santana revealed. "When I opened it, I realized what it was, so I closed it up again and hid it." She sat across from her and the box. "It's for you, I think… Might have been your present… for today. I was going to give it to you tonight after we got back so you didn't…" She paused, lowering her head. She had known this day was bound to be difficult, for both of them.

Any sort of celebration, holidays, birthdays, had been something that they shared, the three of them, for years. They had their traditions, and this was the first of those days they would have to spend without Quinn. Santana had hoped to start the day off well with the breakfast, and then carry on with them having as much fun as they could. She knew that at some point, probably in the middle of their day but hopefully at the end of it, the memory of their lost friend would come to throw her off. She would give her the box, hoping that as much as it hurt to remember, seeing what Quinn had meant to give her would bring her some happiness.

"I think about all the good things that happened to me this year, getting the baby… in progress… and even the starting to dance again… But whenever I think of all the good…"

"You think about her," Santana finished. Brittany sat in silence. "Britt, open the box," she told her. It took a minute or so, but then she reached to do as told. The box had been kept shut with a piece of tape. With the flaps pulled back, she could see whatever was inside had been kept safe with bubble wrap. She carefully reached in until she found the object and pulled it free. She unwrapped it to realize what it was.

"Is that…" she blinked, her eyes watering again.

"She knew how much you wanted it, and that girl could find anything," Santana laughed, as Brittany observed the music box from up close, taking in the details. When she opened it and the ballerina sprang up, the music began to play, and Brittany cried. Santana put the box on the ground so she could move closer and put her arms around her wife.

"Are you okay?" she asked, not too far from losing it herself.

"It's perfect," Brittany promised.

"I can call Hattie and June and tell them we won't come after all," Santana offered.

"No, I'll be okay," Brittany shook her head. "We should go out, we should do it, I want to."

"You sure?" Santana asked. "We can figure out something else."

"I'm sure. You planned it all, and I want my surprises," Brittany smiled up at her.

"I did have a couple things, been waiting to see the look on your face," Santana admitted with a nod.

After placing the music box on the nightstand by her side of the bed, they had finally gotten dressed and headed out to join Hattie and June. The break caused by the box was healed slowly over the day, with friends near and far, all making it so Brittany's birthday was a good one. Going back home, she had found the music box again, and seeing it there made her smile. Quinn may not have been with them anymore, but every time she would look at that box now, it would feel like she was.

THE END

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******A/N: This is a one-shot ficlet, which means that signing up for story alert will not bring you any alerts.  
****In the event of a sequel, the story will be separate from this one. And as chapter stories go, they are  
************always clearly indicated as such [ex: "Days 204-210" in the summary] Thank you!**


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